Впервые опубликовано в инстаграме @ann_chernykh 6 февраля 2020 года.
На ретрите по радикальной честности было несколько любопытных правил, которыми мне хочется поделиться. Особенно одним, которое вошло в мою жизнь и в мою речь.⠀
Говорить «и» вместо «но»
⠀
Мне так хорошо с тобой, И я не хочу с тобой жить
Я рада тебя видеть, И я злюсь на тебя
Мне сложно, И я буду продолжать стараться
Хочу, И не могу
⠀
«Но» — противопоставление из чёрно-белого мира. Мира, где всё искусственно упрощено и схематизировано. Где либо это, либо то. Где есть хорошо или плохо, правильно или неправильно, нормальность или отклонения, всё или ничего, мы или они. Жизнь гораздо богаче и изобильнее, чем эти бинарные оппозиции. Как спел об этом Борис Борисыч: «Луна и солнце не враждуют на небе, и теперь я могу их понять».
Как только мы выбираем «и» вместо «но», мы будто делаем любое наше высказывание многовалентным, открытым к дополнениям, к наращиванию и аккумулированию разных уникально сочетающихся в нас смыслов.
⠀
Я хочу высказаться, И я не знаю точно, что сказать. И я смущаюсь. И я радуюсь твоему вниманию. И я представляю, что занимаю слишком много твоего времени. И я боюсь, что тебе станет неинтересно. И я замечаю, что оцениваю себя. И я злюсь, что ты отводишь глаза. И я благодарна тебе за возможность быть услышанной. И… И… И…
⠀
И мне представляется, что это «и» даёт нам чудесные возможности:
⠀
🌱 Не ловить самих себя в ловушку коротких и ясных фраз, к которым нечего добавить. Пока мы живы, нам всегда есть, что добавить.
🌱 Примиряться потихоньку с тем, что в нас сосуществуют, на первый взгляд, конфликтующие и исключающие друг друга желания, чувства и мысли.
🌱 Представлять себя не разделёнными пополам «Спортсменами» Малевича, а длящимися, текучими, состоящими из неисчислимого количества красок, импульсов, действий, взаимосвязей.
🌱 Выражать себя смелее, многограннее, сложносочинённее, занимать столько пространства и времени, сколько хочется.
🌱 Обогащать вместо обесценивания. Привносить в споры и противостояния точки зрения, ситуации, жизненные примеры, не укладывающиеся в аргументацию сторон, смеющиеся своей живостью, напоминающие, что может быть по-другому, и ещё сотнями способов.
⠀
И,глядишь, потихоньку окажется, что места достаточно самым разным нам и нашим выборам 🙌🏻
694 комментария
Somebody essentially help to make severely articles I would state. This is the first time I frequented your website page and up to now? I amazed with the analysis you made to create this actual put up extraordinary. Magnificent job!
I do like the way you have framed this specific situation plus it really does present me personally a lot of fodder for consideration. On the other hand, through everything that I have seen, I simply just wish as the opinions pile on that individuals stay on issue and don’t start upon a soap box involving the news du jour. Anyway, thank you for this superb point and whilst I do not concur with this in totality, I value your perspective.
Great amazing things here. I am very satisfied to see your post. Thanks so much and i am having a look forward to contact you. Will you kindly drop me a e-mail?
I like this weblog its a master peace ! Glad I detected this on google .
You actually make it seem really easy along with your presentation but I in finding this topic to be really something that I think I’d never understand. It sort of feels too complex and very vast for me. I’m taking a look ahead on your next put up, I?¦ll attempt to get the grasp of it!
I am forever thought about this, appreciate it for putting up.
I’m really loving the theme/design of your blog. Do you ever run into any web browser compatibility problems? A handful of my blog readers have complained about my blog not operating correctly in Explorer but looks great in Opera. Do you have any ideas to help fix this problem?
Fantastic site you have here but I was curious about if you knew of any message boards that cover the same topics discussed here? I’d really love to be a part of community where I can get feed-back from other knowledgeable people that share the same interest. If you have any recommendations, please let me know. Appreciate it!
Hello my loved one! I want to say that this post is amazing, great written and include approximately all important infos. I would like to look more posts like this.
Hello.This article was really interesting, particularly because I was looking for thoughts on this matter last Friday.
Some truly nice stuff on this internet site, I like it.
Excellent post. I used to be checking constantly this blog and I’m impressed! Extremely useful information specifically the ultimate phase :) I take care of such information a lot. I used to be looking for this particular info for a long time. Thank you and best of luck.
It is really a nice and useful piece of information. I am glad that you shared this helpful information with us. Please keep us informed like this. Thank you for sharing.
Can I just say what a relief to find someone who actually knows what theyre talking about on the internet. You definitely know how to bring an issue to light and make it important. More people need to read this and understand this side of the story. I cant believe youre not more popular because you definitely have the gift.
I really like your writing style, fantastic information, thankyou for putting up : D.
I think you have noted some very interesting details, appreciate it for the post.
Fantastic site. A lot of useful information here. I am sending it to several friends ans also sharing in delicious. And obviously, thank you for your effort!
Thank you for sharing with us, I conceive this website really stands out : D.
Enjoyed looking at this, very good stuff, appreciate it. «Golf isn’t a game, it’s a choice that one makes with one’s life.» by Charles Rosin.
I really like your writing style, wonderful info, thank you for posting :D. «Faith is a continuation of reason.» by William Adams.
I believe this is one of the so much vital information for me. And i am glad studying your article. However wanna remark on few basic things, The site taste is great, the articles is in point of fact nice : D. Just right job, cheers
Very interesting topic, regards for putting up.
Right now it sounds like Drupal is the best blogging platform out there right now. (from what I’ve read) Is that what you’re using on your blog?
Hello, Neat post. There’s a problem with your site in web explorer, would check this… IE still is the marketplace chief and a huge portion of folks will omit your great writing because of this problem.
Great – I should definitely pronounce, impressed with your site. I had no trouble navigating through all the tabs as well as related information ended up being truly simple to do to access. I recently found what I hoped for before you know it at all. Reasonably unusual. Is likely to appreciate it for those who add forums or something, site theme . a tones way for your client to communicate. Nice task.
Awesome site you have here but I was wanting to know if you knew of any discussion boards that cover the same topics talked about here? I’d really like to be a part of online community where I can get feedback from other experienced individuals that share the same interest. If you have any suggestions, please let me know. Kudos!
I think other website owners should take this web site as an example , very clean and wonderful user genial style.
Great write-up, I’m regular visitor of one’s site, maintain up the excellent operate, and It is going to be a regular visitor for a long time.
I like what you guys are up also. Such clever work and reporting! Keep up the excellent works guys I have incorporated you guys to my blogroll. I think it’ll improve the value of my web site :)
Keep functioning ,fantastic job!
What’s Happening i am new to this, I stumbled upon this I’ve found It absolutely useful and it has aided me out loads. I hope to contribute & help other users like its aided me. Good job.
Hi, I think your website might be having browser compatibility issues. When I look at your blog in Ie, it looks fine but when opening in Internet Explorer, it has some overlapping. I just wanted to give you a quick heads up! Other then that, very good blog!
of course like your web site but you need to check the spelling on quite a few of your posts. A number of them are rife with spelling issues and I in finding it very bothersome to tell the truth on the other hand I¦ll definitely come again again.
This is very interesting, You are a very skilled blogger. I have joined your rss feed and look forward to seeking more of your great post. Also, I have shared your website in my social networks!
Great – I should certainly pronounce, impressed with your site. I had no trouble navigating through all tabs and related info ended up being truly simple to do to access. I recently found what I hoped for before you know it in the least. Reasonably unusual. Is likely to appreciate it for those who add forums or anything, site theme . a tones way for your customer to communicate. Nice task..
It is perfect time to make a few plans for the longer term and it is time to be happy. I have learn this put up and if I may I desire to recommend you some interesting things or advice. Perhaps you can write subsequent articles regarding this article. I wish to learn more things approximately it!
Hiya, I’m really glad I have found this information. Nowadays bloggers publish just about gossips and internet and this is actually annoying. A good web site with interesting content, this is what I need. Thanks for keeping this web site, I’ll be visiting it. Do you do newsletters? Can not find it.
I simply couldn’t go away your website before suggesting that I really loved the standard information an individual supply for your guests? Is going to be back frequently in order to check out new posts
I am curious to find out what blog system you happen to be utilizing? I’m experiencing some minor security problems with my latest site and I’d like to find something more risk-free. Do you have any solutions?
I am always thought about this, regards for putting up.
Hey! Do you use Twitter? I’d like to follow you if that would be okay. I’m definitely enjoying your blog and look forward to new updates.