«Из этих лимонов ещё получится заебись лимонадик», — куражилась я прошлым летом, разбираясь с судебным иском.
— Что-то я потеряла всякую надежду и совсем перестала видеть, какой из этой истории может случиться лимонад», — со слезами призналась я на терапии несколько недель назад.
— Да, на лимонад не похоже, скорее на крепкую такую терпкую настоечку. Что пьёшь и поёживаешься, — ответила мне на это терапевтка, свидетельствуя мою тщетность и угнетённость.
И так красиво эта метафорическая настойка влилась в тему сентября — время праздновать урожаи, что хочется и тут поделиться.
Я думала о том, как детстве нравилось есть ягоды с куста и с нетерпением дожидаться пенки от варенья, которое варила мама. Нравились пироги и морсы, варенья и лимонады. А взрослые солили огурцы, мариновали грибы, обсуждали какие-то наливки… Всё это казалось непонятным, невкусным, лишним. Хотелось быстрого сладкого счастья, запомнить всё хорошее и забыть всё плохое.
А сейчас подбирается время, когда нет-нет, да и подумаешь о том, что можно засолить, замариновать, заспиртовать. Далеко не в каждый рецепт пойдёт сахарный сироп.
Ещё по теме:
Сожаления и утраты — как пережить горе и двигаться дальше?
Можно сварить джем, а можно островатый пряный чатни. Можно засушить мяты, а можно горьких трав, которые помогут пережить простуду и прогонят паразитов. Даже не самые съедобные на первый взгляд грибы, при засолке становятся вкусны и хрустящи.
Частенько, оставаясь с горькими, печальными переживаниями, с утратами и скорбью, с неслучившимся и упущенным, с сожалениями и грустью, подмывает скорее что-то с этим сделать. И можно, конечно, по старой цветаевской привычке «шоколадом лечить печаль и смеяться в лицо прохожим», можно негодовать и злиться, мол, где мои сливки и пенки, ватрушки и конфетки, можно обвинять тех, кто рядом, что не уследили, не уберегли, а можно потихоньку распробовать эти взрослые угощения, сообразные тому, что творится на внутренней кухне.
Сушить и ферментировать, коптить и вялить. Учиться снимать горечь, закатывать в слёзный рассол, чтобы достать зимой сопливые грибочки. Настаивать на спирту вяжущие ягоды и разливать их по стопочкам на тесной кухне.
Не всё, что с нами происходит, можно взять и переварить свеженьким. Не всё нам так уж нравится с первого глотка или укуса. Не всё кажется долгожданным и питательным. Но уж, что выросло, то выросло. И если с уважением отнестись к тому урожаю, который созрел, заметить его, обработать и не дать стухнуть, то и зиму можно протянуть, и на будущий год, глядишь, веселее будет.
Впервые опубликовано в инстаграме @ann_chernykh 6 октября 2021 года.
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