9 недель. Была бы я в школе идеального тела #секта, выложила бы сегодня впечатляющие фотки «до и после» и восторженный пост о том, как изменилась моя жизнь, получила бы сотню комментариев с восхищениями и уйму новых подписчиков. Но в моём внешнем виде мало изменилось за 9 недель проекта Год Важных Вещей. Как и в образе жизни.
Разве что теперь я каждый понедельник планирую несколько часов на то, чтобы написать этот пост, а всю неделю смотрю на свою жизнь через призму важности и принимаю решения, исходя из этого. Наверно, это совсем не так впечатляет, как потерянные килограммы :)
Но мне нравится.
Дизайн
Конечно, как девочка, выросшая на ценностях Тёмы Лебедева и Стива Джобса, как визуал и минималист, я всегда наслаждалась дизайном, в котором нет ничего лишнего, только ясный понятный смысл, переданный лаконично и просто, что дорогого стоит.
Помню, когда я только открывала магазин хороших детских игрушек, мне важно было продумать классный дизайн для него, одновременно цветной и детский, но и спокойный, натуральный, живой.
Тогда мы впервые встретились с Варей Рябининой-Задерновской. Варя слушала, задавала вопросы, что-то записывала, а через несколько дней вернулась с крутейшей идеей. Раз игрушки деревянные, натуральные, простые, то она подумала, что ещё мамы, разделяющие такие ценности делают с детьми? Конечно, много мастерят, используют для творчества с детьми подручные материалы, вот, например, штампики из картошки! Это просто, наглядно, ребёнок может повторить, а результат получается смешной, забавный, немного неровный, но живой и веселый. Кроме того, иногда, когда делаешь штампики, не учитываешь, что изображение будет зеркальным, и получаются смешные ошибки, например, буква, развернутая не в ту сторону.
Варя вырезала из картошки штампики и искала то самое настроение. Так и получился логотип для магазина, вроде просто неровные детские буковки, а на самом деле уже в самом процессе производства букв была заложена та аналоговость, которая была так важна в ассортименте самого магазина.
Когда спустя несколько лет я задумалась об оформлении блога, задолбалась примерять шаблоны из Canva.com, даже искала подходящий рукописный почерк среди читателей в инстаграме, я поняла, что без Вариной помощи не обойтись. Снова мы долго говорили о задачах, о ценностях, о том посыле, который мне важно транслировать. Немного хулиганства и дерзости, небрежности и быстроты, простого и смелого. Варя не просто разработала для меня фирменный шрифт, извела небось кучу бумаги на то, чтобы нарисовать всё это вручную, но и составила для меня крутейший гайд, в котором понятно, как и в каких пропорциях, для создания каких акцентов использовать элементы.
Я тащусь от этих больших полупрозрачных букв и цифр, от логотипа для журнала, не вмещающегося в рамки, от наших простых и пропитанных подругомным настроением полезных сувениров.
И это не только у нас с ней такое взаимопонимание. В прошлом году Варя делала дизайн для психологического фестиваля «Остановка», я видела три совершенно разных варианта, каждый из которых очень лёгкими, незаметными, если не вдумываться, и потрясающими, если присмотреться, средствами передавал глубокую идею, которую вкладывала Катя Суворова, психотерапевт и организатор фестиваля.
Кроме этого, Варя читает лекции по истории графического дизайна, я была на одной, очень интересные! Можно подписаться на её группу по истории графического дизайна и приобщиться.
К чему это я? Да к тому, что я всегда могу порекомендовать вам прекрасного дизайнера, да, вот её сайт и портфолио — Варвара Рябинина-Задерновская. И к тому, что дизайн — важная вещь. И ещё к тому, что я каждый раз радуюсь, что у этого Года Важных Вещей такие красивые обложки с номерами недель!
Тиндер и удаление профиля там
В течение прошедшего свободного года я время от времени тусовалась на тиндере, листая вправо-влево фотки всяких разных мужиков, то и дело с кем-то совпадая, переписываясь, даже сходила на несколько свиданий и встретила одного человека, который добавил глубины образу моего внутреннего друга.
Многие считают, что тиндер — приложение для секс-знакомств, но эти слухи сильно преувеличены. Думаю, как и везде, вопрос в том, кто чего ищет. Мне вот трудно захотеть человека по фотке, нужен совсем другой уровень близости. На который я, надо сказать, не особо была готова в любом случае.
Но тиндер оказался прекрасен тем, что раз за разом напоминал, насколько многообразен мир мужчин, как много людей, близких по ценностям, раскидано по миру, что часто с первых слов понимаешь: «Не, что-то тут не то». Помню, первый же разговор, перешедший в первое тиндер-свидание, был с испанским тревел-блогером. Представляете? При этом в профиле у него ничего не было о блогах написано, но вот слово за слово выяснили, и так обрадовались оба! И чудесно погуляли по осеннему городу, с хорошим кофе и разговорами на английском обо всём на свете и о блогах, конечно.
Было много забавнейших моментов и разговоров, шуток и полного бреда. В моменты отчаяния, когда казалось, что я теперь всегда буду одна, тиндер напоминал, что мир изобилен, и кто-то всегда готов составить мне компанию. Типа: «Привет! Рад знакомству! Как ты насчёт серьезных отношений?» (ахаха!)
Почему же я удалила профиль и не хочу возвращаться? Несмотря на то, что это почти такая же социальная сеть, как вконтакте или фэйсбук, у неё свой особый формат, заточенный на сиюминутность и одноразовость. Сейчас смешно и можно переписываться целый вечер, а назавтра мы точно не напишем друг другу. Если встречаться, то сегодня-завтра. Если сообщения, то короткие. Если что-то не так, молча удаляешь из пар и никакой возможности это переиграть. Как в игре какой-то. От этого мне тем более дороги исключения, в виде общения, продолжившегося в других местах.
Я поняла, что не хочу в своей жизни таких одноразовых отношений, у которых нет толком ни начала, ни развития, ни завершения, как не хочу одноразовых стаканчиков для своего кофе. Пусть всё идёт своим естественным чередом.
Stop and smell the roses
Про подход «stop and smell the roses» я узнала от Рэйчел Стэффорд, HandsFreeMama. У одной из её дочерей именно такой подход к жизни, который и заставил Рэйчел задуматься о том, что на самом деле важно, успеть на кружок или останавливаться у всех роз по дороге и наслаждаться их ароматом. Когда я читала статьи из её блога, я ещё не осознавала, что моя девочка вполне исповедует те же ценности. Да что уж там, мне и самой они не чужды. В прошлом году в Берлине у Таши появилась традиция подходить к красивым тамошним цветочным магазинам и с упоением касаться носом каждого цветочка, до которого можно дотянуться. И пусть весь мир подождёт…
Тогда в Берлине это казалось забавным. А сейчас, по утрам, когда сборы в садик занимают куда больше времени, чем бы хотелось, для меня большой вызов — справиться со своими раздражением и спешкой, признать её право на её ритм. Иногда всё-таки тороплю и сержусь, а иногда получается поймать какой-то приятный дзен, надеть Таше свитшот с её фирменной татуировкой STOP AND SMELL THE ROSES, подаренный нашей общей рыжей подругой, выдохнуть и сделать для себя тоже что-то приятное и неспешное.
Платить за квартиру
Недавно на учёбе мы говорили о социальной адаптированности как показателе психического здоровья. И среди прочего преподавательница привела в пример мужа, который после ухода или смерти жены, больше года не платит за коммунальные услуги, потому что это всегда была обязанность жены, а он всё к новой реальности не может приспособиться. В этот момент я вспомнила растущую стопку разноцветных квитанций, лежащую уже полгода у меня на столе.
Показатель ли это моего психического нездоровья? Вряд ли. Но этот учебный пример стал чудесным толчком, чтобы наконец разобраться со всякими бумажками, к которым я не прикасалась много лет, и начать платить за квартиру. Я пришла домой и за полчаса погасила долг за полгода. Горда собой страшно!
Синдром зародыша
Ещё со школы я знаю этот странный термин, про который я почти ничего не нашла, быстро его погуглив (ну разве что пару странноватых статей про синдром именинника). Но ещё со школы я остро ощущаю перемену в своём состоянии за пару недель до дня рождения. Вот и в этом началось. Хандра, растерянность, раздражительность. Ещё и промозглость погоды в унисон.
В статьях, разумеется, даются псевдопсихологические советы, как ничего не чувствовать, просто встретить день рождения весело и радостно, как в детстве. Поэтому перечитаю свою собственную про спады и подъёмы, попишу в дневник, порасспрашиваю папу и бабушку, о том, что они знают о моём рождении и неделях перед ним, ну и найду для себя поддержку сама, уж это-то я умею теперь.
Обратная связь от читателей
Получила на этой неделе письмо от читательницы Софьи Рахимовой:
«Я совершенно ничего не знала о блоге и проектах, поэтому для меня было откровением: «О, да это мама той самой Таши, которая „Давай попробуем“ (вы же знаете, что эта статья выложена в каждой группе, посвящённой хоть сколько-нибудь осознанному родительству?), а потом: „О, да это та самая Аня, которая организовала Simple Day!“ (а это был едва ли не первый мой „выход в свет“ с ребёнком, так что тот летний день я вряд ли забуду!).
В общем, я просто хочу вам сказать спасибо! За вдохновение, за честность, за то, что сейчас мой браузер далёк от минимализма, потому что почти каждая ссылка в каждой статье открыта в новой вкладке, и я читаю одну за другой. Самое чудесное, на мой взгляд — это ощущение близости и согласия с незнакомым лично человеком. Но знать, что где-то тут, рядом, в этом же городе, живут единомышленники, очень ценно!»
Письма от читателей бывают трогающими до слёз, заставляющими ходить неделями и думать над ответом, странными, улыбательными, короткими и очень длинными, но они являются для меня большой поддержкой и напоминанием, что то, что я делаю, ценно. А ведь были времена, когда я до ужаса нуждалась в постоянном поощрении и восхищении, а когда получала его, то мне не удавалось пустить внутрь и принять хотя бы часть того добра и тепла, которые мне предназначались. Я могла быстро пролистать десяток-другой искренних и добрых комментариев, найти один язвительный или недовольный и долго думать только о нём.
Слава богу, этот фильтр удалось починить :) теперь приятное, тёплое, хорошее и светлое попадает в самое сердце, конструктивная критика учитывается головой на будущее, а всякий булшит — по боку, так, дай бог, посмешить друзей.
Я не всегда отвечаю на комментарии, иногда забываю или отвлекаюсь и не успеваю отправить ответ, но всё читаю и храню все ваши светлые сердечные слова. Спасибо вам!
Возможность не вымучивать ещё один пункт для правильности
Да, тут мог бы быть седьмой пункт, на него даже много претендентов собралось в эверноутовской заметке, но сегодня это всё не то. Сегодня я просто воспользуюсь своей возможностью сказать столько, сколько сказала, не дотягивать до положенных и привычных семи пунктов, не добавлять ничего формального в довесок, не лить воды и не соответствовать правилу, которое сама же завела. Йеее!
Что скажете, хорошие? Как вы там?
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I have observed that over the course of developing a relationship with real estate homeowners, you’ll be able to come to understand that, in every real estate financial transaction, a commission is paid. In the long run, FSBO sellers don’t «save» the commission rate. Rather, they struggle to win the commission by doing a strong agent’s work. In completing this task, they devote their money and time to execute, as best they are able to, the jobs of an broker. Those responsibilities include exposing the home by way of marketing, delivering the home to buyers, developing a sense of buyer urgency in order to induce an offer, arranging home inspections, dealing with qualification assessments with the loan company, supervising repairs, and facilitating the closing of the deal.
Thanks for your posting. One other thing is when you are disposing your property alone, one of the troubles you need to be alert to upfront is how to deal with household inspection reviews. As a FSBO home owner, the key to successfully transferring your property as well as saving money about real estate agent revenue is information. The more you are aware of, the softer your property sales effort are going to be. One area that this is particularly significant is reports.
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One thing I have actually noticed is that there are plenty of myths regarding the lenders intentions any time talking about foreclosures. One fantasy in particular would be the fact the bank needs to have your house. The financial institution wants your hard earned dollars, not your property. They want the money they lent you together with interest. Keeping away from the bank will simply draw a new foreclosed realization. Thanks for your post.
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In accordance with my research, after a the foreclosure home is marketed at an auction, it is common for your borrower in order to still have a remaining unpaid debt on the financial loan. There are many lenders who attempt to have all rates and liens paid by the up coming buyer. Having said that, depending on certain programs, legislation, and state legislation there may be some loans which aren’t easily handled through the shift of financial loans. Therefore, the obligation still lies on the debtor that has obtained his or her property in foreclosure. Many thanks for sharing your opinions on this weblog.
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